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Thinking…
Posted on December 23rd, 2009 37 commentsIt started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then to loosen up. Inevitably though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.
I began to think alone —”to relax,” I told myself — but I knew it wasn’t true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.
I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don’t mix, but I couldn’t stop myself.
I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, “What is it exactly we are doing here?”
Things weren’t going so great at home either. One evening I had turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother’s.
I soon had a reputation as a heavy thinker. One day the boss called me in. He said, “Skippy, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don’t stop thinking on the job, you’ll have to find another job.” This gave me a lot to think about.
I came home early after my conversation with the boss. “Honey,” I confessed … “I’ve been thinking…”
“I know you’ve been thinking,” she said, “and I want a divorce!” “But Honey, surely it’s not that serious.”
“It is serious,” she said, lower lip aquiver. “You think as much as college professors, and college professors don’t make any money, so if you keep on thinking we won’t have any money!”
“That’s a faulty syllogism,” I said impatiently, and she began to cry. I’d had enough. “I’m going to the library,” I snarled as I stomped out the door.
I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche, with an AM station on the radio. I roared into the parking lot and ran up to the big glass doors … they didn’t open. The library was closed.
To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night.
As I sank to the ground clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye. “Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?” it asked. You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinker’s Anonymous poster.
Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker. I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was “Porky’s.” Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting.
I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home.
Life just seemed … easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking. —
stolen Boss, College Professors, Divorce, Dizzied, Employment, Glass Doors, Going To The Library, Honey, Job, Kafka, Lunchtime, Meaning Of Life, Nietzsche, Parking Lot, Reputation, Skippy, Social Thinker, Syllogism, Thoreau, Zarathustra35 responses to “Thinking…”
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Priceless!
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Jeremy Jones December 28th, 2009 at 01:27
Thinking is a very real and serious problem. Although it may seem harmless at first it can be a gateway that leads to harder things, like asking questions, and forming your own opinions.
I thought for years before I realized I was addicted, and then it got worse, I began to have ideas that things in the world weren’t perfect and that maybe there was something wrong with he way we live in our society.
Thanks to the support of my wife and friends I managed to break free form this sick obsession and now I can enjoy shopping and football again like nomral people.
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Without a doubt thinking at work is a reason for termination almost everywhere, especially in the US. Maybe that is why our economy is in the toilet, millions are laying around collecting money from the government, and everyone is dying because they can not afford to be well. So what do you think about that?
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James Tanner December 29th, 2009 at 11:09
I used to think a lot too, then my boss told me one day, “James you think too much, you over think everything.” After concentrating on this for some time I realized she was right. I also realized I didn’t get paid enough to think so I let her do all the thinking, my job has been so less stressful since then, even things like driving and relationships have been so less mind consuming.
I’ve learned and adapted to using my base desires to control my life, I am happier, my stress levels have gone down and even my cardiologist says I might have added another 10-15 years of life.Thoughtlessness has saved my life.
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You guys are funny. We have brains for a reason don’t we? What separates from the rest of the animals in the kingdom is our conscious though. Turning off thought is going against instinct. The problem is not thinking but what one thinks about. Channeling the thought to a certain direction will make all the difference. One becomes unified with thought when they act and feel what they think. So what I have to say…think what you feel and feel what you think. Any other way would be denying who you truly are.
How about we think about what needs to be changed and act upon that?
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What the heck? I’m 15 years old and i think constantly. Thinking is not a bad thing. David’s right. The way we think is a part of what makes us unique. It affects our beliefs and our outlook on the world. And Jeremy why shouldn’t I ask questions and form opinions? I love to look at the world and ask myself “how was this made?” or “Why is such-and-such-a-thing like this?” To me it is fun to ask stuff. If we no one thought then where would the U.S.A. be today. If no one thought then America might still be segregated. Maybe we wouldn’t have electricity. Also, don’t let other people tell you that you should change. If your friends are saying you should change, then maybe they aren’t true friends. True friends accept the ones around them for who?what they are… good and bad.
All I really wanted to say with this is that thinking isn’t bad and I love to think.
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lol seriously, its a paradoy.. a joke. It’s on a site with the word THOUGHTS in it
This site is all about my thinkings (and those thoughts I steal ) ^___^ -
emmas got it right, and im glad to see that some kids of the new generation think like her,….the other day i walked out my appartment and caught some 11 year old girl giving oral to some 17-18 year old in my backyard at like 12pm …. thats what a parent that dont teach thier kids that thinking is good , they become mindless and easy to take advantage of…. this generation is going down the crapper , and its scary because thats americas future….those kids are who your gonna have to rely on taking care of you when your too old to take care of yourself, and to run the government….i know it might hurt some ppl to do, but THINK ABOUT THAT!!!!
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Erzbergender December 30th, 2009 at 05:43
Ahahaha if you fail to grasp the satire, maybe you should try thinking occasionally.
I jest, I jest. Think and be free.
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I believe that there are functioning thinkers. But I have learned that I am not one of them. So I quit. It’s been tough.
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I told myself I could quit thinking whenever I wanted. Before I knew it I was thinking first thing in the morning. I would think all day and throughout the night. Sometimes I would stay up until 4 am thinking.
It’s okay now though. The doctor prescribed me some pills. I’ve been clean for six months now.
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Charlie December 29th, 2009 at 19:00
Some people should think a little more before they think about leaving dumb comments.
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Navneet December 29th, 2009 at 20:15
I thought a lot and I came up with this… (not my words)
dubito ergo cogito ergo sum
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Everytime I find myself thinking too much, I grab some Scotch. So far I’m 8-months recovering.
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Suchros December 30th, 2009 at 04:58
I am still thinking too much, but I’m trying to stop. It doesn’t really interfere with my job, but relationships go awry and I get depressed when I think how much better many things could be done, if people just understood or thought about them.
I also stopped reading news for six months, it did wonders to my depression, but now I had a relapse and I’ve been reading and watching news. Too bad I cannot quit, I’d be a lot happier just not thinking.
For some this is parody, for me this is a serious issue. I even took some pills doctor ordered for half an year but when I stopped I just saw I’d gone with the masses etc the whole time, and got depressed on that, I kind of lost my individuality (or most of it) so I quit the pills. Now I’m thinking about starting them again, just to be happier.
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You can’t think freely while under the influence of industry standards.
I’m a suppressive thinker, and trying to recover with pharmaceuticals due to my thoughts’ dark but true nature.
Unstructured thinking can be dangerous and self-depricating.
Controlling consciousness is almost impossible, but if done patiently and with hope, it can be done.
So be carefully aware, thinkers of the world.
Life in the 21st century is tough, thus the need to read Kafka and Thoreau and perhaps Emmerson and even Nietzsche!
Great post man.
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Iulian December 30th, 2009 at 08:04
This can be seen as a conspiracy….encouraging people not to think, believing that it’ll lead to a better life. Isn;t life stressful enough? why not make it better? and think abt how to create more time for goodness and things that really matter! Evolution has always come from thinking! if it wasn;t for this, we’d still be sitting in a cave.maybe not thinking too much can lead to some failures, but for some it has its meaning. and i believe if it makes you feel alright, go for it.There are indeed people that think and make something with it, there’re some that think and donlt really accomplish anything. It depends on what you actually search for.
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I was a binge thinker…Life would be normal for weeks on end and then something would set me off. I’d be gone for days at a time. Friends and family wondering were I was.
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This is great, but one thing did irk me. This piece reinforces the stereotype that men are rational thinkers and women are emotional and vapid. The narrator is a man, who reads only works by men. The only female character (of course, a woman wouldn’t be the boss) is anti-thinking, taking refuge with another woman (her mother) to get away from thinking. I know that it wasn’t the intention, and I really don’t want to come off as rude, especially when you wrote such a good piece. Just giving you something to think about.
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derek O December 30th, 2009 at 11:17
I can really sympathize with your post. I started my thinking habit early on. I come from a long line of thinkers. I found myself in junior high feeling like an alien because I was the only one thinking. I thought it was normal. I thought everyone was brought up that way.
Once I realized it wasn’t normal, I began to feel guilty about my thinking, which of course led to even more thinking. I guess you could say I thought, so that I wouldn’t have to feel bad about myself.
At some point in my early 30’s I found out that the thinking wasn’t working anymore. All of my friends, who never thought as much as me in the first place, moved on, got married, found careers, became politicians, etc. And here I was still thinking all day every day.
So I decided it was time for a change. I have been thoughtless for 2 years now. I use non-words like “tooken”, “brung” and “thunk.” I drive an SUV. I eat plenty of trans fats. Hell, I even let someone else re-roll the toilet paper holder after I have used the last sheet.
Life may not be perfect but now that I am thoughtless I feel like a part of society.-
peter bevan December 30th, 2009 at 12:41
derek..
I’m awed. Yep, I worked too hard, took life too seriously and spent too much time thinking.
I’m going to retire and join society.
_pete
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I have enjoyed this post as well as the comments. To Emma, humans do NOT have instincts. Only animals have instincts. We are in a higher order and do have the options of controlling our thoughts/actions.
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Only to a certain degree can we control ourselves. If you think you’re in conscious control all the time, or even most of the time, I recommend reading up evolutionary psychology as well as the study of cognitive heuristics and biases, then take a simple course in neurology.
Anyway, I loved the post.
Perhaps unfortunately for me I think so much that I can’t stop thinking long enough to realize I have a problem, as all these non-thinkers keep trying to tell me.
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Great! Love it. Think I should run out and join TA tomorrow. I’ve been thinking for many years and didn’t know about TA till now. Thank you so much for this wonderful information.
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Ryan Williams December 30th, 2009 at 17:27
Hi, my name is Ryan, and I’m a thinker. It started, like so many do, so innocently, my friend offered me some Vonnegut, and I tried it (what’s the harm?). But then it all came crashing down. I just couldn’t stop thinking. I was quickly swept up by the bright lights and well typeset pages. Soon enough, I couldn’t even get pleasure from it, I just had to think to feel normal. Gardener’s History of Art, New England Journal of Medicine, 1984, it didn’t matter. I hit rock bottom a couple years ago when a close friend said I was turning into a– a professor. That did it, I resolved from then on to clean up my mind and stop thinking; for good this time. Now, thanks to the support of TA, I’m on the path to recovery, and I hope in time that I’ll be able to stop thinking completely. I’ve given up using the dictionary, and I’m well on my way to quitting on all books.
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Ok. Humans do not have instincts. Skunks do! I don’t ever remember spraying someone when I feel they are a danger. Evolution? That is another soap box. And No we are not completely in control at all times. Our nervous systems are complicated, as to include sympathetic and parasympathetic. Just a tiny bit of info on our autonomic nervous system. Most of us know this. WE DO HAVE THE OPTION OF CHOICE.
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Jim Spahr January 6th, 2010 at 11:59
A question for Elizabeth: We, as humans, don’t have instincts? Are you serious? Did you ever flinch when you heard a loud noise? Have you ever experienced the urge to flee (fight or flight), have you never heard of “maternal instincts”? Here’s a tip for you. We are animals. We are animals who use tools and have speech, but we are animals none the less.
Perhaps in your case a little thinking would be a good thing. -
Holley January 13th, 2010 at 08:07
Oh Elizabeth you silly goose
“Humans do not have instincts. Skunks do! I don’t ever remember spraying someone when I feel they are a danger.”
That’s because you are not an animal with a gland used to spray things when you feel they are a danger. However, you do have hands and the ability to use tools and weapons with those hands, something that a skunk does not have.“Evolution? That is another soap box.”
One that you would surely make an ass out of yourself trying to explain away, I’m sure. Anyone now a days who doesn’t believe in evolution is either a complete moron or a victim of brainwashing. I’m sure this sounds elitist but I don’t care, those who deny evolution are just as stupid as people who claim dinosaurs did not exist.“Our nervous systems are complicated, as to include sympathetic and parasympathetic.”
I’m sure an argument can be made for evolution slowly tweaking our bodies to have a sympathetic nervous system since we don’t have claws or fangs or anything like that, thereby allowing us to quickly make an internal decision to fight or flee–but it’s pretty obvious so take from that what you will“Just a tiny bit of info on our autonomic nervous system. Most of us know this. WE DO HAVE THE OPTION OF CHOICE.”
Nice pretentious choice of words. “most of us know this”. Oh you. And what does that even mean? We do have the option of choice? You do realize that we can run on some instinct and still make decisions, right? For example-I may be inexplicably drawn to a male partner who I feel will be a good provider and has good genes[evolutionary instinct], but it is my choice whether or not I will pursue him. And finally- Typing in capital letters does not make you right, it’s the equivalent of yelling over someone you’re having a debate with. Grow up, lady. -
Over thinking the human condition will only lead to despair and stagnation, petty human issues and convictions are important because they have to be, end of story. Glad to hear you abandoned pretentious bs and returned to conformity. peace.
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Jay the thinker January 20th, 2010 at 13:01
Have you ever ask yourself, where does the toughts comes from?
Have you ever ask yourself, how does a tought is created by youre brain?
Have you ever ask yourself, why youre thinking about what youre thinking right now?
like….
if you try not to think at all, if you try to forget everything…. after a couple of seconds, ( or couple of minutes for the powerfull minds) you will start thinking about something again…….
but why do you think about this after freeing youre mind?
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I discovered that NLP and conscious living make a huge impact on my thinking. I always wanted to live in a “bubble’ like everyone else but now I love the fact that I can control my thoughts and my life and have a direct effect on the outcome of things just through thought manipulation. Its hard but it works.
Ive done the pills and the booze and the everything else but now I know that thinking=individuality=freedom. Yay freedom. -
Philboyd Studge February 28th, 2010 at 07:20
This just doesn’t bear thinking about. It should be compulsory reading throughout high schools…
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Chris December 24th, 2009 at 02:15